17 April, 2026

I'm a quiet person, at least to a lot of people I am a very quiet person. I don't really like to label myself as a quiet person, especially after reading Carol Dweck's Mindset, I made effort to be different, by practicing to speak more, especially in front of many people.

Few years back after a daily stand up, a colleague asked if he can tell us some jokes, he said it's because he'll be telling these jokes for toastmasters session. That's the second time I heard about this toastmasters club, the first time it was my lecturer, she posted some photos on Instagram, so I knew it's a public speaking club.

Less than a year later, months after I left the company, I joined the same toastmasters club. He didn't expect to see me there, and it was a fun surprise. I remember arriving with another guy with a very special name, I can't remember it now. He's a lawyer and I suppose he's there to improve his speaking.

I was there to improve my speaking as well, but it was for sales. I left the company for a startup and there's only the two of us, we had to wear many different hats, so I had to wear the sales hat, which is something that is entirely new to me. It was a huge step for me, and I was actually quiet excited for it, knowing that it's a good chance for me to stop labelling myself as a quiet person.

The first session went really well I could already tell that I love the whole vibe, everyone was laughing, it was wholesome. After the session I signed up immediately, made the payment, it's not cheap because we have to pay in dollars, but it's a good investment, that's a understatement, it's definitely one of the best investment I have ever did. It shapes who I am today, aside from books, this moulded me into someone I never thought I'll become.

Took me a month to prepare for my ice breaking speech, the title is "Journey to the Wes". I can still remember so clearly how I got this idea, there's one night I just couldn't sleep at all, no matter what I did, meditated, read for almost an hour, did all I could I just can't fall back asleep. It was late and suddenly this came to my mind, the Monkey King story, I wrote it down in my Apple Watch, I still have it with me in the reminders app.

"Monkey king", "Golden head amulet", "Journey to the". I actually thought there were more of it. The whole point of the ice breaking speech is just to introduce about myself, and I wanted to make it special so I tried to find the resemblance of myself and the monkey king. It's also very personal to me because my dad used to tell me the whole story at bedtime when I was a kid, I could still remember it so well, lights off, double decker bed, I can still picture it so well, the room at the right, dad was at the part where the monkey king and the others got stuck in a maze, good old days.

I was having so much fun writing the speech, ideas keep coming and I just couldn't wait to tell others about it. I told dad about it during our walk and he seems to like it, of course he does, he's in both the beginning and the end of the speech, which I resemble him as the monk in the story and we talk walks together every evening, like how in the story they walked to the west together.

I could still remember so clearly on the way there it was raining heavily, I couldn't hear myself. I was so nervous I texted my mentor about it, he reminded to me that it's like riding a bike, we don't immediately know how to write one right away, don't expect it to be perfect, that's the whole point of doing this. I'm not there to impress anyone, I'm there to make myself better, and I was really glad that I texted him, but I was still so nervous when I stood up there.

I was freezing up there but I was sweating, I was speaking so fast without realising, I only got to know this when I got the evaluation. They laughed when they heard the title, Journey to the Wes by Wes. It's something new, something fresh I know that they will probably like it, and it's wholesome with a sweet ending, what matters the most is that it's flawed, my arms were awkward, I was not taking enough pauses, I was not making the eye contact with the room, I was speaking too fast, I was riding a for the first time bike and falling, but with these bunch of people, it was a nice fall.

My second speech I talked about bananas, it's my favourite fruit. Yesterday a colleague asked me about my favourite fruit I couldn't answer it, it has been awhile since I've eaten a banana. I used to eat it every day, not because of the taste, if it's because of the taste I would've get sick of it during the first week. It's because of how well it fits to my calorie counting, oatmeal with banana, yogurt with banana, protein shake with banana, and just one banana before heading out to gym feels just right, it's the perfect fruit for me.

It also gave me chance to speak again instead of giving in to the fears from the first speech. This one I had so much fun giving it as well, I just learned about the hook, and started with how this fruit help me lost weight, become disciplined and changed my life, everyone was like what, it was fun. It took me more than a month to prepare this speech though, I was forming the habit of preparing speeches like mastering a craft, it was long and I wrote it again and again, memorise it by writing down on a piece of paper, threw it away and write again, I was talking to myself while taking my walk alone, people who drove by might think I was some crazy person, it was worth it, it was really fun.

Third speech it took me one week to prepare, because someone suddenly cancelled and no one took the slot, so I took it because the club president insisted. This is a big lesson to me as well, a little push can bring such a huge impact. Again and again being pushed even until last week I was pushed on stage, not for toastmasters but something else, after I stopped joining toastmasters for over a year, I was nervous again, falling off my bike again, but it was yet again, impactful.